Ya know....I just got to thinking while i was logging in here today....who reads this? I know Erin & Emily are out there (you girls rock!)...and a few other friends/family members i shared the link with....but anyone else out there? Just say Hi.....
Weekend went well. AF finally came on Thursday evening.....Friday I just felt dumpy and had a killer headache....so we ended up leaving for Massachusetts on Saturday morning instead (and this also ensured Paige would get a good night's sleep Friday night....as she hasnt been easy to get to bed lately when we're away from home!). Anyhow...we left the house around 10:45am, and got to my parents house shortly before 2pm.
It was great to take my dad out.....he just wanted pizza & beers...so we went to Cape Code Cafe.... chatted about work, economy stuff, investing....i talked with him about wishing we could move back to the area....it was nice to be open and have uninterrupted chatting with my dad...it's been years. Got him back to the house around 6:30pm (btw, he KNEW...LOL.....but still acted surprise..;-)) .... Was a fun night. Jenn went CRAZY with the food spread....my goodness....sooooo much food...but it was sooooo good! My mom got a GIANT strawberry shortcake cake, custom made from a local Italian bakery. Wow. The kids ran a muck all night. Even 1 y/o Owen stayed up....crankily...but he was up til Chris & Jenn left at 11pm. Paige, Erin, Taylor & Brett had a blast. Paige was Taylor's kitty cat for a good hour or so.....which was good, cause she tries that at home ALL the time, and frankly...we're tired of it, so we dont play along.....it was nice to get it out of her system. LOL.
Anyhow...the house emptied out around 11pm.... Paige didnt nap AT ALL (even on the 3 hour carride).... she did amazingly well, tho. She zonked right out 2 minutes after her bedtime story by 11:30pm. Bugger only slept til 7am, tho!!! D'OH!!!! She was a pill most of Sunday morning--- we went out to breakfast, she ate 2 HUGE smiley face pancakes....then slept the ENTIRE ride back home. Phew.
I know i need to bust out everything to Mike....no holds barred..... point-blank.... are we continuing this charade....do you want things to change.....are we in this for the long haul....or are we done? ....but to be honest....Im SCARED. We've had this discussion/argument MANY times before..... things change...but only temporary.....then go right back to this loveless, emotionless, non-physical relationship crap again. We only have Fri, Sat & Sunday nights together....after Paige is asleep to talk. This weekend was crazy...so I had planned to do it last night.....but alas...when i finally got the courage to bring things up...i was too exhausted and could hardly keep my eyes open. Sucks...cause now i have to wait a whole 'nother WEEK before i have my chance for a heart-to-heart again. *SIGH*.
My wish? For him to score a full-time high paying job. We buy a house in Southern Mass, move closer to family....he works days.... we have another child..... we see each other every night...eat dinner as a FAMILY.... .and can watch regular prime time, weekday TV together every night after the kids go to sleep. We can go to SLEEP together, too! No more empty bed. Such a simple life...........
Anyhow.... tis Monday again.... the snow is slowly melting.... its only in the low 30's today, but the sun is out. Paige wet the bed last night.... i really need to get her another set of sheets (only have 1!).....cause her bed is now stripped since the 1 set of sheets is in the washer. Poor thing was embarrased and felt so bad. I had to ensure her several times it was OK.
We heard "Picture to Burn" by Taylor Swift....about 20x this morning. UGH...my child is obsessed. I need to make her CD "disappear" for a few days just ...for a mental break....lol..... i know, mean, right? Hehe.
Alright....should go get some work done....
1 comment:
Glad AF finally came for ya. I talked to my OB about suddenly having unpredictable cycles and she told me that as your body gets older, you can start being that way, just for the reason of getting older. Huh. :P
Sounds like you had a great visit with your family!! I'm happy you were able to go, and that it ended up being so fun!
I really think that when you talk to Mike, you should tell him how unhappy you are about everything - his job, living so far from family, and that you NEED him to start looking and applying for better jobs in an area closer to family. You NEED that in order to be happy! Honestly, I don't think ANYONE could make a marriage work with the situation you guys have right now - it's just too hard when you don't spend any time together! Heck, marriage is hard when you have every day together, but when you only have the weekends, it's just not even a marriage, ya know what I mean?
It's obviously not working out for your family, so something big HAS to change, or you may as well end it. You're living as a single parent already! :( I hope you have a good talk with him this weekend, and I hope he's receptive and tries to help solve things for you guys. At least make some good goals, talk things out, and connect. I'm hoping for only great things for you and P!
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